I finally deleted Facebook from my phone

Well, it has finally come to this.

I deleted Facebook from my phone.

This could be a first step in eliminating it entirely from my life. But right now, more than ever, it’s one small thing I need to do.

As much as I love seeing people's families grow, sharing achievements, celebrating milestones, and sending birthday wishes to those I haven’t seen in years, I can’t ignore the fact that something very insidious has been permeating the platform – and our culture – for a while.

Over the last few years, I haven’t been as active on Facebook as I once was – perhaps because I’m not the same person I was 18 years ago when I first created my profile. Hell, I’m not the same person I was 5 years ago. The 2020s have not been kind to me (or the world). I lost both of my parents within 3 years of each other, and during that time I also suffered other significant losses that I refrained from sharing here – because hey, social media is all about curating and showcasing the good stuff, right?

The more you lose, I realize, the more you gain an appreciation for what you still have – that is, if you have the right tools and a healthy support system to help you realize that. And I’d like to hold on to what I still have – most of which is my sanity.

What I have also realized is that there are two different realities we are living in ever since we let social media take over our lives. Hence why I'm sharing Shelly Hart-Remmel's post for context:

As a result, livelihoods are being ruined, in many different ways, dictated by algorithms and other forces that enable the worst in us.

Opinion is constantly being peddled as truth. Information is cherry-picked to fit what is now clearly fascist narratives. Education is constantly being diminished – look at the rise of anti-intellectualism and attacks on schools and universities. And ignorance and hate are constantly being legitimized and given microphones to spread lies that undeniably endanger communities and poison the world.

With that also comes the rapid decline of our media literacy, which needs to be addressed more, because it is helping this insidiousness spread. We have a population that is either A.) not aware of certain tactics used to exploit fears and prejudices and incite violence, B.) THINKS they know how they're being manipulated, or C.) is willfully ignorant of these practices, allowing the algorithm to keep them trapped in their echo chambers, susceptible to rage bait.

This lack of awareness only allows people to place their trust in comfortable, convenient fiction rather than harsh fact. Words quickly lose meaning. Definitions dissolve. Values get warped.

For instance, calling someone a “champion of free speech and healthy political discourse” is irrefutably NOT the same as someone who blatantly rejects the required Principles of Healthy Debate (humility, curiosity, respect) and therefore abuses his constitutional right to free speech.

Someone who uses manipulative tactics and toxic rhetorical patterns designed to control, confuse, and dominate – wrapped in the language of politics – should NOT be defined as a winner.

Someone who constantly shifts the narrative and moves the goalposts by changing midstream, leaving opponents chasing clarity while he avoids accountability – should NOT be considered an inspiration.

Someone who gaslights by misrepresenting what others say, twisting words, and insisting on an alternate version of reality until his opponent is left defending against distortions instead of making their point – should NOT be labeled as a dignified speaker.

Someone who practices word salad to overwhelm, disorient, exhaust, and bury opponents in rapid-fire talking points and tangents – in order to win at the expense of others – should NOT be defined as a great debater.

Someone whose goal is never the mutual exploration of truth but total humiliation while finding victory in degrading others and punching down – should NOT be eulogized as a patriot.

Finally, someone whose speech isn’t just manipulative in style but fueled by hate, racism, misogyny, bigotry, disinformation, and ALL the phobias – as clearly seen in hours and hours of verified footage – should NOT be celebrated as a hero.

Yes, the First Amendment protects the right to say those things, but that legal protection does not make one a hero of speech—it only means the government can’t silence it. *Speaking of silencing, we are living in deeply hypocritical times because that's what sinister forces are making our government do as I write this. (See: Colbert and Kimmel)

So...let’s not confuse the "right to speak" with the responsibility to engage in honest discourse. Free speech may protect hate, but hate speech should never be exalted as an example of free speech or politics “done right.” Also: speaking truth to corrupt power – even through satire or comedy – should never be equated with hate speech.

The more we glorify such abusive and damaging tactics as “healthy discourse,” the more we erode our ability to actually engage in it.

And please, let’s not equate “refraining from mourning someone who poisoned free speech and endangered vulnerable communities” with “celebrating the loss of a political activist and influencer.” They are not the same.

THAT ALL SAID, you can still find me on social media (IG, Threads, Bluesky, Substack) – I just won't be hanging around the FB watercooler that often anymore. I realize I'll still be plugged into the Meta machine, but this small step is hopefully a slight move towards something more...enlightening.

"How you die does not redeem how you lived. You do not become a hero in your death when you are the weapon of the enemy in your life. I can abhor the violence that took your life, but I don't have to celebrate how you chose to live." – Rev. Howard-John Wesley

*Additional thanks to Kate Anthony for some of your words I've integrated into this post.