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Showing posts from January, 2012


BABY'S FIRST PODCAST

The good folks at Picktainment were kind/crazy enough to let me verbally share my thoughts on the recently released Sam Worthington thriller, Man On A Ledge. As much as I hate hearing my voice on playback, I must say it was a nifty, little experience. If you're not one for listening, then you can read my full review over HERE, in which I also question the casting of Kyra Sedgwick as a Latina TV reporter (yeah). Teaser: Jamie Bell and newcomer Genesis Rodriguez steal the movie. And if you'd like to tune into my inane chatter, then click below. My debut comes in at the 10:18 mark:

Listen to internet radio with Picktainment on Blog Talk Radio
Thanks to Phil Wallace and his Picktainment team for going easy on this podcast virgin. I look forward to more in the future.

H.P.M.


HOT NAKED GIRLS

In an attempt to see if keywords in the title of a post truly influence the number of page views, I have given this entry the above name. Consider this an experiment I'm conducting while doing my part on a soon-to-be-launched news site that's been in the works for the past two years (let's just say that I've been given the title Entertainment Editor). Exciting stuff.

Of course you won't see any buxom females in the nude here. I'm sure that would be in violation of the Blogger (my publisher) code of conduct. Actually, blogs that feature "adult content" and run through these types of publishers usually ask visitors to click through a prompt asking them if they either a.) accept their terms and conditions b.) promise not to be offended by said content or c.) are over 18 years of age (Some of you out there know exactly what I'm talking about).

Regardless, I'd like to think that I wouldn't have to resort to such desperate tactics. Unless...I'…


SHIT SHIT SAYS

Even though I don't have the time or patience to edit a montage of funny quotes, I figured I might as well jump on the bandwagon/overdone trend and offer this up to the Internet gods.

Please feel free to share, tweet, and repost to your heart's content.

H.P.M.


THEME SONG OF THE MONTH: JANUARY 2012

For those who know me, this month's pick will seem like a giant departure from my usual pop fare. No synths? No dubstep? No Top 40/club potential? Yes, my current obsession involves none of the above but includes some haunting vocals I can't get out of my head.

Gotye (I'm still figuring out how it's pronounced) is a Belgian musician who's starting appear on the radars of American rock stations...and bringing on a serious Jim Morrison vibe. I happened to catch "Somebody That I Used To Know" when my alarm clock radio went off one morning. Even though I was half asleep, I grabbed my iPhone off the nightstand and immediately Shazamed it...and I'm so glad I did.

And whaddya know? The video for this beautifully simple single is equally quirky yet mesmerizing (just wait for that chorus):


RANDOM THOUGHT OF THE WEEK #29

What is it about a just-delivered box of fresh office supplies that gets everyone in the office to turn into 7-year-olds waking up on Christmas morning?


WORLD WIDE WIDTH

I've been blessed with what my mother refers to as "pork chop feet."

It's neither a sizable trust fund, an antique jewelry box, nor a collection of vintage hardcover novels that I have inherited from both my mother and my father. No, what has been passed down to me is the inconvenient genetic anomaly that is wide feet.

The above image is a picture of a Brannock device, a tool I was familiar with every time my mother would take me to the mall to buy new shoes for the school year. Placing my foot on the cool metal, the salesman would always comment on how wide my foot was (and that I've grown another inch!). Having wide feet was, and still is, a pain in the ass. It was especially frustrating back then because I was relegated to certain brands of sneakers or, as a private school brat, brown loafers or black lace-ups. I could never wear the popular brands my friends were wearing. No Nikes, no Adidas, no Reebok. While young boys my age were running around in their trend…


10 REASONS WHY DOWNTON ABBEY IS THE NEW CRACK

It took me a year to finally hunker down and see what some of my friends were raving (or tweeting) about back in 2011. A British costume drama? On PBS? Is it a remake? Well, at least it's got Dame Maggie Smith, and you know I just looooove me some Dame Maggie Smith...

Ladies and gents, I can honestly say that after watching - no, consuming - all seven episodes from the first season on Netflix and catching the two-hour second season premiere earlier this week, I am hooked. Actually, more than hooked. Obsessed.

And it looks like Brian Moylan over at Gawker has already articulated why my Downton Fever is growing by the day. Check out his explanatory breakdown here. I couldn't have said it better myself.

That said, allow me to offer some other explanations as to why I, and the rest of America, can't get enough of this engrossing slice of British television:

1. I consider myself an Anglophile, and for me, this is almost like porn.

2. The producers and writer/creator Julian Fell…


20 YEARS AGO: THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE

Twenty years ago this month, one film was responsible for the surge in nanny-cam sales across America: The Hand That Rocks The Cradle.

Directed by Curtis Hanson, who would later go on to helm critically-acclaimed dramas like L.A. Confidential, Wonder Boys, and In Her Shoes, the film starred Rebecca De Mornay as Peyton Flanders, a vengeful widow who infiltrates a happy Seattle family in order to wreak havoc on Claire Bartel (Annabella Sciorra), the woman responsible for ruining her husband's life (he was a gynecologist molesting his patients, so he had it coming). And to make matters worse, Peyton suffers a miscarriage and goes off the deep end, becoming hellbent on making Claire's family hers.

Fans of Julianne Moore will be happy to see the redheaded actress in her early years - before she became Julianne Freakin' Moore - playing the role of Marlene Craven, Friend Who Learns A Deadly Secret And Pays The Price. The feisty, chain-smoking real estate agent, who also gets the ti…


WHO IS THE LOS ANGELES ARSONIST?

As some of you may have seen in the news, a serial arsonist has been terrorizing the city of Los Angeles, particularly in the neighborhoods of West Hollywood. While this is truly a horrible chain of events (53 fires!), it's hard to believe that this is the job of one person. Although a suspect has been apprehended, a 24-year-old Canadian dude named Harry Burkhart (below) who's been pissed about his mom's deportation to Germany, I can't help but wonder if others were involved in setting this city ablaze.

Hence my own list of suspects...because you never know.

Suspect #1: Disgruntled Starbucks Barista - He's served thousands of lattes to unappreciative Angelenos, is mad as hell, and he's not gonna take it anymore!

Suspect #2: Lindsay Lohan - Because she's doing research for the role she wishes to covet in the Firestarter reboot.

Suspect #3: Michael Bay's Pyrotechnician - He was pissed when he found out he wasn't hired for Transformers 4.

Suspect #4: Some G…


TWENTY12: Another Winter Playlist

Now that the big shiny ball in Times Square has dropped and you've sworn off all food after surviving multiple holiday feasts, a fresh outlook on life is called for - and you'll need the right soundtrack to help you start things anew. Here are some tunes for the new year, the sound of the future, the music of the Here and Now.

Get on it:

1. "Shady Love" by Scissor Sisters
2. "Where Have You Been?" by Rihanna - Taking dubstep to the next level. If this isn't her next single, then someone at her record label needs to be fired.
3. "Move On U" by The Saturdays - A current guilty pleasure.
4. "Levels (Radio Edit)" by Avicii
5. "I'm In Love" by Alex Gaudino
6. "Tonight Is The Night" by Outasight - LMFAO's sleazier cousin.
7. "Anyway" by Cee-Lo Green
8. "Bridge of Light" by Pink
9. "Dark Side" by Kelly Clarkson - Kelly shows us some insecurities in this sparkling gem that's loaded with po…


...In Bed

I knew it was talented but this is quite the compliment.