Size Matters

It is understandable that the most successful blogs are the shortest and easiest to read. It's a flash-in-the-pan world out there after all. People do not want to be bogged down with pages and pages of rants and ramblings. They want a tasty morsel, something to scan and file away in their brain, a read that lasts as long as this paragraph.

I blame the Perez Hiltons of the world for feeding us e-junk, temporary fixes to satiate our accelerating hunger for tidbits on the trivial. They have graffitied over the definition of a blog. The true meaning is now lost amidst the countless e-diaries and websites dedicated to captioned pictures, submitted headlines, and video reactions.

But there is an inkling in me that considers my entries just as worthwhile, a pride in knowing I am supplying to subscribers a satisfying read, neither pretentiously pompous nor painfully boring. I like to think my lengthy entries carry a substance that is seriously lacking in some current blogsites.

However, to appease the masses who may find my paragraphs-after-paragraphs unattractive or too challenging to conquer, I will close out with a simple (short) sample of my suggested soundtrack for June, July, and August.

The perfect mix for the season of sizzle, by yours truly:

SPLASH: SUMMER OF '07

1. "Everything I'm Not (Jason Nevins Remix)" by The Veronicas - Easy-breezy, sugary, girl rock-pop - redone for your dancing pleasure.

2. "Valerie" by Mark Ronson featuring Amy Winehouse - Motownish bee-bop meets old-school hip-hop...from the British superproducer's debut album, Version.

3. "Knights of Cydonia" by Muse - The perfect epic-rock score for the closing credits of any Tarantino-esque splatterfest. And it's great to blare when speeding away from cops on the 405 Freeway.

4. "Feels Like Home" by Meck featuring Dino - Gravelly vocals electronically layered with some rockin' beats = neato.

5. "Falling Slowly" by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irgolova - From the Irish indie Once, and possibly the best soundtrack of the year, this melancholy love song soars to emotional heights you never thought existed.

6. "Umbrella" by Rihanna featuring Jay-Z - It just wouldn't be summer without another 80s-sampling club track starring the best thing to come out of Barbados...God, what a difference Jay-Z makes. RUNNER-UP: "Shut Up and Drive," the rockin' single Kelly Clarkson should have released and never did.

7. "Makes Me Wonder" by Maroon 5 - Fabulous, feel-fine funk-rock for the soul.

8. "Apologize" by Timbaland featuring One Republic - Forget the Furtado and point your ears towards this mesmerizing collaboration - America's #1 producer lays his trademark stuttering beats on this ballad by the little-known Los Angeles-based band.



9. "Acceptable in the 80s" by Calvin Harris - A synergy of synth and sass, this British DJ, who only has "love for you if you were born in the 80s," will make you wanna bust out the neon track jackets and acid-wash jeans and do your best Molly Ringwald two-step.

10. "You Are The One" by Shiny Toy Guns - Electro-punk done right.

I hope this was short enough to hold your attention. Forgive me for dumping on you a questionably wordy diatribe and keeping you from the more important tasks you need to focus on during your day or night - writing that memo for your boss before lunch, getting the laundry out of the dryer so your neighbor can carry on with his load, picking up the kids at school, completing that status report for your office manager, turning your attention to the lover who awaits under your bedsheets...

It's okay. Go ahead. Carry on. I'm done. No, really.

Bye.

H.P.M.

2 comments:

Jenny said...

I love your paragraph-after-paragraph style! It has substance and keeps me entertained. And knowledgeable on your life.

:)

J. said...

Amazing! SIZE does matter : ) Consider this a momentous occasion: Josalynn has read one of Hiko's blogs in its entirety!!! I knew it was possible, only you seemed a little bothered about the new and improved shortened version. A little perkier next time, yes? LOL. Thanks for sharing your lovely summer music collection Hiko-Piko! Until next time...