Here are eight typical answers I've heard repeated at various press events...as well as my interpretation of each soundbite.
Feel free to match famous names with any of the following:
1. "The director. I'm such a huge fan of his films. I've always wanted to work with him." TRANSLATION: I needed to clean up my tarnished reputation after TMZ caught me on a bender in West Hollywood, and this guy's filmmaking pedigree is just what I needed.
2. "I always thought there was more to the story that needed to be told." TRANSLATION: The studio had me nailed down for at least two sequels. Besides, they promised me a 20% increase in my fee with each movie. Score!
3. "I always found his/her life story to be so fascinating. He/she contributed so much to our society, and I really wanted people to see a side of him/her no one really knew about." TRANSLATION: A biopic? Give me that damn Oscar!
3. "The 3D technology is amazing. It really adds to the story without it feeling like a stunt, y'know? We always had the intention to shoot it in 3D." TRANSLATION: I've got a backend deal on this flick. Five percent of the box office, baby! You do the math.
5. "My agent sent the script, and I could not put it down!" TRANSLATION: My agent hounded me for a month while I was holed up drunk in a hotel suite with my supermodel girlfriend down in Cabo.
6. "I did it, frankly, because it scared me, and I love a good challenge." TRANSLATION: I'll do anything to get me out of this pigeon-holed mess I've gotten myself into.
7. "I've always been a sucker for romantic comedies." TRANSLATION: Have you seen my co-star? I've been plotting to tap that ass ever since he/she went full frontal in that arthouse flick two years ago.
8. "My friend [insert famous actor] called me up and told me he was doing it, so I was like, sure why not?" TRANSLATION: Bitches, I got so much clout in Hollywood, I can make a movie about the invention of the Q-Tip, and it'll be number one at the box office!